Saturday, October 5, 2019

El Misterino: Chapter 2

I had every intention of like, actually doing this, and posting every week or every other week or like, at the very least not letting quite so much time past in between chapters.

I have a hard time doing things anymore. No, I won't be clarifying--"things" is the appropriate word. Anything less general would fail to capture just how few "things" I do these days. I find it exhausting to do anything that doesn't allow me to completely shut down my brain, and these days, no one else really cares whether I do anything or not, so there's very little upside to breaking with my recent form and doing things.

But, last weekend I met a couple of people who admitted to having read some of these entries and they weren't under duress or nuthin, so maybe if I write a little more it won't go entirely unnoticed. Or maybe I'll feel better. Anything's possible! [Editor's note: most things are impossible.]

The hell was going on in this book, anyway?

I don't remember; I'm going to have to reread the second chapter, and that's a real bummer and I don't advise anyone do it. I usually end up reading these chapters twice. Once straight through, and then once in chunks as I dissect for larfs. This chapter is going to be at least three passes and that's three too many!

So. Christian Grey died and his little brother is kinda-sorta involved with his widow, Anastasia, but also has a new housekeeper who's from somewhere war-torn or also maybe just Poland? Anyway I think this book is about Christian's brother's housekeeper getting adopted like she's a rescue pet or something, and also probably they have sex. It's going to be like that episode of Seinfeld where Jerry is dating his housekeeper and he doesn't want to pay her because she's not really working and somehow when we watch we're supposed to identify more with the guy who employs a housekeeper than with the housekeeper. I'm on to you, Seinfeld! [Editor's note: Alden is on one of his classic Seinfeld rants but will try to actually read the book after the jump.]